Yesterday was Penelope Maddy's colloquium talk, which I'd been looking forward to for ages because I find her work very interesting (though I don't think I'll ever be a Second Philosopher myself), but also because she teaches at UC Irvine, where I'm planning to apply. I signed up to attend the dinner afterwards, but Josh had the good idea of asking her to have coffee, as well, and happily she agreed.
Maddy and I had met before when she gave the logic lecture my senior year at Smith, and she read some of my undergrad thesis and said very nice things about it. She's incredibly smart and really generous - reading the thesis of a total stranger is a mighty generous move, as is giving advice and time to someone with no claims on her at all. Maddy and I sat in the IMU Starbucks and discussed my future, and she had a lot of good things to say.
For one thing, she pointed out that grad school doesn't last all that long (she called it 'a blip'), so it's okay if the location is less than ideal. How long until I have my PhD - maybe five, six years at the outside. I can endure a little discomfort for five or six years if I have to.
She also disagreed with Joan, who said that I might make enemies if I apply to CUNY and then turn them down a second time. Maddy doesn't think I should worry about this, but she also thinks that CUNY is where I need to be. Apply to CUNY and Irvine, she suggested, and if I get into Irvine they'll fly me out to visit and if I love it I can go, but really I ought to be in New York. And in my heart I know she's probably right.
It's been suggested that I really just want to go to New York and CUNY isn't really the right place for me. This is backwards; CUNY is one of the best places in the world for what I want to do, and the thought of living in New York fills me with dread. But people have done much harder things than spend five years in New York on a shoestring. So now I am devoting a few minutes a day to positive visualization: I'm picturing myself running around Central Park, studying in the library, wandering through grocery stores in Chinatown, riding the subway. I'm thinking about how close I'll be to my family, and maybe Andrea will be in New York next year, and I'm sure TMBG will have the occasional free concert.
I'm looking at apartments. I'm thinking about budgets and jobs. I can do this.
(If they'll let me.)
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2 comments:
Yes you can. Yes, you can, my dear.
I recently made a really great new friend who is a CUNY Law School person. She now lives part time in Sunset Beach and in the DC area with her delightful lawyer husband. She might be a useful contact some time if you DO go to CUNY. On the other hand, Aunt Joan's son David lives near Anahiem and that great family would LOVE to have you near them! Astronomers are frequently quite the philosophers, too.
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