The trouble is that my students don't seem to know how to behave in a college classroom. I have people talking when I'm talking and even talking during quizzes. What's worse, I have one student who's been making what seem like inappropriate comments - pointing out chalk on my skirt, using "I buy you coffee because I think you're good looking :)" as a solution to homework - and bringing it up several times in class. It was clear last week that at least one of the other students was put off by this guy's attitude towards me.
I told some of my professors, who were sympathetic and had some good suggestions. There was a common thread, however - Jonathan said not to wear high heels. Sandy said to wear pants and a jacket. Joan said she'd never teach without shoulder pads. If you want respect, they seemed to be telling me, you're gonna have to butch it up.
On Thursday, Jonathan was out of town, so my co-AI and I had to lead the lecture - 80 students. I had nightmares the night before, and the day of the lecture I wore pants, sneakers, and a jacket with shoulder pads - small ones. And that day my students hit a new low.
I was whistled at. In lecture.
I didn't know what to do; I was struck dumb. I gave the class a cold look and started blushing. I was burning up in my stupid jacket but I couldn't move to take it off.
J stepped in and told the class that there would be none of that, that no one deserves to be treated that way, and that if such behavior persisted he would have to take disciplinary measures. I was so grateful to him and from then on the class was all right, but I was terrified about my sections today. Now they'd seen that
- They could get to me
- I needed someone else - a male - to step in and defend me. I hadn't done it myself.
But nothing happened! My sections went off like a dream. I was brusque but not bitchy, and they acted like civilized humans. I didn't even have to give my speech.
I don't know if my problems are over. But for today, I am feeling so much better about things.
*Does my speech remind you of something? Perhaps Father's speech in Bedtime for Frances? Me too. Oh, well.
3 comments:
Sadly, rudeness, as Miss Manners no doubt says, is all too common. This story reminded me of your stories of teaching in rural China. I am glad that you did not have to beat any of them but keep it in mind that dealing with it immediately and decisively is the key. Also, there's this: http://www.indiana.edu/~bfc/docs/policies/sexualHarassmentPolicy.pdf
Perhaps mentioning that when you taught in China you had access to disciplinary methods that you might find it necessary to have recourse to here might help. Most people assume that it's all about capital punishment there and would probably assume that you intend to kill the unruly. Failing that, saying something like, "Look, your frat boy act isn't funny, and could find you brought up on disciplinary charges," probably gets it done. Don't feel bad about pulling the trigger, either. It's the 21st Century, even in Indiana. People know when they are crossing a line.
The sad part is that these "children" have the opportunity to learn to reason from a very bright woman who has some important things to teach them. They probably won't get it and will end up voting for "THE WRONG CANDIDATES" all their stupid lives while wondering how this bad stuff is happening to them.
Meanwhile, the STUDENTS in your classes will find it more difficult to learn. Please concentrate on THEM. They too, will be voters.
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