Yes-Bias For the Win

Last night was a very good example of why it is better to say yes than no. Those who know me know that I am generally incapable of saying no to things, even things I don't really want to do or which are logistically impractical or impossible. A few years ago my undergraduate advisor, Jay, asked me to spend a few days at his house while he and his wife were out of town, keeping an eye on their teenage daughter and driving her to school soccer practice. I had to turn him down because I couldn't drive. I still think about this all the time, and there is a tiny part of my brain that has never quite stopped trying to work out a way that I could have said yes. Perhaps I could have given the girl a ride on the handlebars of my bicycle!

So, while my yes-bias is ... excessive, it does spring from a fundamentally sound principle, which is that you have more adventures and things work out better for you if you are game. "God looks out for drunks, children, and feisty girls, girls who are up for anything," as Cynthia Heimel said. (Something along those lines - I'm probably misquoting.) "You're going to die eventually anyway, at which point you'll be safe as houses."

So last night I didn't really want to go out when Mike invited me. I didn't know who was going and I was afraid it'd be just me and his pal from Detroit, plus I'm trying to dissuade Mike from asking me out again. God was helpful enough to give me a cold the last time, so that was a good excuse (it also gave me a good excuse not to go to the Spoon with Cufflinks this week), but unless I become a chronic invalid there seems little hope that I'll always be sick when I get asked out. And since I am sick, that was even less reason to go out last night. But I felt the familiar tug of the yes-bias, and before I knew it I was zipping up my black boots and putting on my lipstick.

And of course I had a lovely time. It was all very low-key and agreeable; Luke and VTL were there and I got to hear VTL's awful puns and his and Luke's stories about Germany. Plus, adventure breeds adventure: if I hadn't gone, I wouldn't have been invited to go to Indy to see the Darjeeling Limited, or to go thrift shopping with Luke, or to go to Yoga with VTL and Mike. Will any of these things actually happen? I don't know. But they could, and I am all about possibilities.

Then this morning I went to the farmers' market, where half the restaurants in Bloomington were giving away free samples of delicious soups, as well as recipes. Could life be any sweeter? I fail to see how.