Friday, November 30, 2007

The Word of the Day is "Awkward"

Damn, but there was a lot of awkwardness today. In addition to my date with the mathematician (who emailed me to ask me out again so chalk that one up as a victory) I had a terrible interaction with the Werewolf. Just when I think he and I have turned a corner we get all awkward again. The Werewolf, for those who don't recall, is my officemate, an 8th-year Kierkegaard scholar. He is very nice but I find him really intimidating and we've had some miscommunication in the past.

Today I was taking a break from my interminable Lewis paper and reading Questionable Content when I heard the key turn in the lock. I tried to close the browser, but I wasn't fast enough and the Werewolf saw me scramble to look busy.

"You don't have to stop reading blogs just because I come in," said the Werewolf.
"I wasn't reading blogs, I was reading a comic," I said, blushing.
"Well, you don't have to stop."
"Yes I do. That's what office-mates are for."
"To hold you accountable?"
"Um ... in a no-pressure kind of way."
"Well, anyway, you don't have to stop doing what you're doing when I come in."
"I do though," I persisted. "I mean, I have to do epistemology."
"Not because of me," the Werewolf insisted.
"No, but I just do. And have been! For hours on end!" I insisted.
"I'm sure you have."
I stood and started to gather my things.
"You don't have to leave just because I'm here! I'll only be here for a few minutes."
"I'm not," I said. "I'm just - I have to go ... somewhere else."
"You don't have to."
I got out. And I didn't go back in my office for the rest of the day. Aaand I probably never will.

Later, after a philosophy of language meeting, the Junior who was sitting next to me asked, "What are you doing after this?"
I had been afraid of this. He was chewing gum, and throughout the lecture the sound of chewing and smell had been bothering me. "I'm going to my office to get my stuff and then I'm going home," I said.
"Can I walk with you?"
"It's not a very long walk," I said. My office is right across from the seminar room. He followed me in and I gathered my things. He followed me all the way to the Union. "Do you want to go inside? I'm not doing anything... we could hang out."
I didn't want to hang out. Eventually I said, "Don't you live over there?"
"Oh. Yeah. I do. I guess we'd better part ways then."
"Okay, bye."
"Bye. Take care! Have a good weekend!"

Look. I don't want to be mean. But I don't know how to make these people not do this. Maybe I should shave my head.

4 comments:

TCA said...

Dear Honey Bee,


This problem of every damn man you meet coming on to you, while very understandable, really MUST be very disconcerting. Are there no interesting women who could become your friends and allies in this seemingly rather intense seat of learning?

Greg said...

Gum-chewing. It'd be better if he smoked.

Emily said...

No, Cufflinks smokes, and he smells awful.

Lily said...

shaving your head is a bad idea if you want to ward off guys. my best friend did, and now she has the perfect mixture of an adorable-yet-totally-hot hairdo we all go for. people are practically chasing her down streets.