Speed Dating

Every once in awhile the GPSO has a “speed dating” event. At least, it used to be called speed dating, but this was considered stressful or exclusionary or something so they changed it to “speed meeting.” After all, they explained, people want to meet people for all kinds of reasons, not just to date. The important thing is making connections with graduate students in other departments and not just hanging out with ethicists all the time, like I do.

My friend Shana is our GPSO representative, and this, combined with the fact that she met her boyfriend at one of these shindigs, means that she’s very gung-ho about the speed meeting. So last night I gave in and went.

Boy were there a lot of shoe-gazers. I was feeling pretty shy myself, but I was once again reminded that there is a spectrum of social anxiety and there are some people beside whom I look like Miss America. During the registration period before the actual event, I attempted to make bright conversation with the shyest mathematician I have ever met and a chemist with absolutely no social skills whatsoever and frightening teeth. I brought out the old, “What power would you rather have, flight or invisibility?” but it was pretty clear I was fighting a losing battle.

Presently we were herded upstairs to the Solarium, where things took a turn for the better. We were seated at a long table with sheets on which to record people’s names and whether we wanted to be friends with or date them. Then we had three minutes to talk to each person before rotating.

This musical chairs format of conversation is unnatural, certainly, and kind of awkward, but I sort of liked it. There’s not too much chance for awkward silence when you only have three minutes. Even if there is awkward silence, it can only last for so long, which is a relief.

Because it wasn’t expressly for the purposes of dating, we all talked to both men and women. I met an economist from China (we conducted our chat in Chinese, which was fun – I haven’t practiced in way too long), a sculptor who works with Indiana limestone, and a woman who specializes in Bosnia. I also met a girl from Buffalo who went to Olmsted and Performing Arts, just as I did, which was pretty neat.

Probably no dates will result from this adventure – the only person I checked the “possible date” box for was the aforementioned mute mathematician – but it could have been more painful than it was. At the very least, it was a different way to spend an evening.